If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
