No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
