Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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