It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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