so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
