can u get pink eye on your cock?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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