Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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