How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
