bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
