There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
