i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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