shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
