When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
