I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I feel like death gave me a hand job
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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