thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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