so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Two words: blizzard sex
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Terrible idea I love it
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
