Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
