dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
