Dual....:-)
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
babies were throwing up all over the place
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
