glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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