We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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