My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
