bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
sarcasm needs its own font
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
