i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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