bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize