So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
You dont lie about slip and slides
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
