dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize