They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
