I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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