bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
