I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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