margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
