Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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