You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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