he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
