Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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