I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
