I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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