just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Randomize
