Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
