SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize