actually, I'm a sock model
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i just google imaged poop.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I want to be your penis for a week.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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