Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
