so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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