I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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