ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
