I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
