Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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