make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
