I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
