youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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